Lots of clichés and sayings are overworked; sometimes, however, they still have considerable impact.  Ask someone whose spouse has just said, “Can we talk?”  or “Are you wearing that?”  Often, they are used to try and lessen the impact of an unpopular statement, like “It is what it is.” “With all due respect.”  “No offense.”  “Having said that.” and “Just saying.”  Of course, they’re not “Just saying.”  They’re just not proud of what they’re “Just saying.”  Parents just love it when a teen responds with, “Whatever!”  No one wants to hear their dentist say, “This may hurt a little.”

I’m a retired math teacher, and one day after giving the clearest, most insightful explanation of my career of an extremely important topic, a student asked, “Will this be on the test?”  My wife now often asks me this after I give too long-winded explanations.  “Can I get extra credit to raise my score?” always bothered me, and I usually asked the student if they wanted to have brain surgery from a surgeon who got through med school on extra credit.  I can’t count the number of times I heard, “I’m sorry that I missed class.  Can you go over what I missed?” In the back of my mind I heard, “Class isn’t important, your time isn’t important, and my dad is paying your salary.”  In my own days as a math student hearing the prof say, “It is easy to see.” almost brought tears to my eyes, because it meant that the prof didn’t understand it either.

There are sayings or clichés that make us just shake our heads, like a coach saying to the team, “I want each of you to give 110%.” an impossibility.  “Have you eaten grandma?” needs a comma, even when said out loud.  My favorite of this type is, “It’s not rocket surgery.”  I know; I’ve conflated “It’s not rocket science.” and “It’s not brain surgery.” I think my version is better.  The most nonsensical one of all is, “Your call is important to us.”  You hear this every time you enter the purgatory of being placed on hold.

I’m afraid that as Christians we have our own clichés and sayings.  Telling someone who is suffering, “God allows everything for a purpose.” or “The Lord never gives people more than they can handle.” gives them little comfort and may even imply guilt.  Saying “If God closes a door, He’ll open a window.” to someone who has lost their job probably provides little support.  Sometimes what we say comes with a measure of judgement.  Examples are “We should speak the truth in love.” “Love the sinner.  Hate the sin.”  “I’m forgiven, not perfect.”  The southern favorite “Bless his heart.”  is not really a term of endearment.

Knowing what to say at times of trouble is difficult.  There are times I felt at a loss at what to say and have resorted to clichés; I felt guilty later.  Now that COVID-19 has caused suffering, isolation, and pain, what should we do?  Paul gave us the answer in Galatians 6:2, “Share each other’s burdens, and in this way obey the law of Christ.”  That means we should show empathy, affection, and love.  We should do our best to reach those who are isolated; we have lots of tools: phone calls, texting, emails, and even old-fashioned handwriting.  I’ve been told one of the best things is to just listen.  In these trying times we need to pray and have faith that God will guide us to reflect His unconditional love.

Jim