Thanks to “The Penguin Principles” about not just surviving but thriving. Penguins are such a delight to watch! We notice that:

• penguins look dignified when standing still. Then they waddle, looking like stumbling, bumbling creatures.
• They fluff their feathers as a cooling mechanism.
• They are small and defenseless, never wanting to hurt anybody.

That was how I felt in the first seven or so years in ministry. “A quivering mass of availability.” I would do anything to make and keep my parishioners happy. I avoided confrontation at all costs. That illusion worked for a while. It kept peace. Then I read about the Inverse Insight Principle. “Sometimes it’s more helpful NOT to do the helpful thing.” I had been carrying everyone’s responsibility. I am still constantly re-learning that I can love people enough to allow them to suffer their own consequences and not rush to their rescue.

I am nearing the seven-year mark at my second pastoral call at Joy. No, I do not have an “itch” to relocate. Not in the slightest! I do find myself assessing, checking out my ministry style. I do not want to harbor any illusions that I’ve got it all figured out. No one is capable of perfection, whether it be as a parent or a pastor. But we can grow and mature. I certainly want to be there for my congregation, but not in a manner that sacrifices my self-esteem and leads to burnout. A caregiver of any kind can fall into that all too easily. By God’s grace, we get to turn a new page in our lives every day. We can be assertive, direct, even strident, and still be loving as Christ loved. There again, our love can only approximate perfection. It is only God who can truthfully love unconditionally. I will close with Lester Holt’s sign-off for the NBC Nightly News: “take care of yourselves and each other”. 

Pastor Art