I was lying awake one night thinking, “What would it be like to read the story of Jesus for the first time? What if I read the Gospel of Mark having no knowledge of Jesus? How would that affect me?”

I don’t have an answer. I searched my mind attempting to recall how the story of Jesus first had its impact on me. I remember as a child hearing the passion story read on Good Friday and trying to figure out why this terrible thing was happening to Jesus. My childish mind was convinced that he must have done something wrong to make God so angry at him. I thought it might have to do with his prayer in the Garden of Gethsemane. “My Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as you will” (Matthew 26:39).

And yet . . .

Here I am a Christian. I don’t have an awareness of one day coming to faith in Christ. I know that some people think that means I’m not really a Christian, but I am. Somehow in my very struggling with what Jesus was about I was a Christian. That story told in the Gospels worked on me even if I didn’t understand it.

I rarely read Scriptures for answers. Maybe that’s why my blogs don’t have a lot of answers. I read to listen to whatever is there whether I understand it or not. The Holy Spirit has a way of getting through to us even when we’re lying awake pondering the imponderables.

Read Matthew 26:36-46 and remember: God loves YOU unconditionally.

Wayne Originally posted March 2019