I don’t remember regarding my grandparents as “young”, or even “middle-aged”. They were always
“old” to my youthful eyes. So, seeing them grow old and eventually reach the end of their life wasn’t a shock to my system. Of course, now, I realize that I myself am now past the age that they were when I was a kid, but still, my perception and memory of them remains as elderly people in their sunset years. |

There is an appointed time for everything, and a time for every affair under the heavens. A time to
give birth, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to uproot the plant. – Ecclesiastes 3:1-2
The aging of one’s grandparents was the natural order of things, and as a grandchild, I was a generation removed from the immediate impact. But to my parents, it was “Mom” or “Dad” that they remembered as “young” and were now watching as older and weaker. As much as we can accept “a time to die,” none of us is ready when it’s our turn to watch someone we love take this journey.

My turn came about ten years ago, when my parents began showing signs of getting older. Gone was the Dad I knew, who could still kick my tail on the racquetball court. Gone was the Mom I knew, who could climb up on a chair to get something from atop the cupboard. Now, granted, living across the country from them was a double-edged sword. On the one hand, I didn’t come face to face with the new reality on a daily basis. But on the other hand, I couldn’t be there for them when they needed a hand, or just a visit from their son.

Have pity on me, LORD, for I am weak; heal me, LORD, for my bones are shuddering. My soul too is shuddering greatly – and you, LORD, how long? Psalms 6:3-4

Some people very close to me are now going through this process, but much more acutely, as they see their parents quite often. There’s no respite for them, no putting it out of their mind for a while, with phone calls or visits on an almost-daily basis. I can see the toll it’s taking on them, body and spirit. I must become, again, God’s instrument. Whether it’s an open ear, a kind word, or just a soft shoulder, I am called to communicate God’s boundless understanding and support for them. I am called to let them know that God does not abandon His children in their suffering.

When you pass through waters, I will be with you; through rivers, you shall not be swept away.
When you walk through fire, you shall not be burned, nor will flames consume you. – Isaiah 43:2

My challenge to you is this: Look around you. Be aware of those bearing the cross of witnessing the
declining years of their loved ones, or other stresses that come with storms. Be their bedrock when
the rain falls, the floods come, and the wind blows. And may God grant you loved ones who can be
there for you when it’s your turn.

We pray:
Heavenly Father, we know that you never leave us in our sorrow. We ask you to open our eyes to
those who are suffering around us. Open our ears, that we may be attentive to their needs. Open
our hearts, that we may hear them even when they cannot speak. Open our mouths, that we may
offer the right words – or sometimes just silent presence if words cannot help. We ask this through
Your Son, who will always be here for us. AMEN.

Jeff (our CT writer and friend)