Then he said to them all, “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me”. (Luke 9:23)

Last night, I finished the book, “Not a Fan”, by Kyle Idleman, pastor of the fifth largest church in America. It was given to me by one of my parishioners. It is one of those books that just hits you between the eyes like a 2×4 beam of hard wood. He refers constantly to the above verse, which hits me over the head like the beam that our Lord Jesus had to carry up that awful hill. The beam he would be crucified on. I fear that I have been deluding myself, and that God is no fool. He knows my every weakness, every transgression.

What better time than Christmas (this is Day 9 of the Christmas season, in case you didn’t know) to consider our fandom. We are quick to say, “Happy Birthday, Jesus”, or “Jesus! My main man!” This book turns the whole notion of being a fan upside-down. In our current verbiage, to say “not a fan” is considered a negative. This book gives many testimonials of people who once were fans, but have made a decision or turned their life around to actually follow Jesus. Each one concludes with the testifier identifying themselves, then saying, “and I am not a fan.”

Please forgive me for paraphrasing this book, but I do feel it’s that important.

Notice Jesus says, anyone.  No qualification necessary. Anyone may follow him. Then he hits hard; using the words must deny himself. I don’t know if I can do that! But unless I do, I am not a true follower. I’m just a fan. Taking up the cross daily? The shame in me wells up when I consider that even though I have tried to live a good life, the fact that I am an ordained pastor does not automatically qualify me as being a follower. The stories later on in Luke’s ninth chapter include the man who wanted to bury his father before he followed Jesus. Jesus says, basically, “nope.”  “Let the dead bury the dead”.  Another guy: “Let me say goodbye to my family; put my affairs in order.” Again, Jesus replies: “unh uh.” The sacrifice Jesus asks us to make just seems to be too much.

Until we remember His sacrifice. Coming down from the bliss of heaven to take on a life of poverty, homelessness, abuse, scorn, ridicule from his own earthly family, flogging, crucifixion.

Believe me, friends, I am still not sure that if it came down to it, having to choose between everything and everyone I hold dear in my life and really following Jesus – possibly enduring all of the above (except crucifixion) – that I could do it.  So I will resolve, on this, the ninth day of Christmas – the dawning of a new year – to at least make a more conscious effort to put Christ first in everything I think, say, and do. I will try to put others first.  I will pray to our Lord for forgiveness when I stumble.  I will remember that in all things there is the grace of God, who is slow to anger and abounding in steadfast, unconditional love.

Pastor Art