I have a dear friend who is slowly fading into the realm of the unknowing. No, Carolyn isn’t actively dying, she is developing one of the many forms of age-related dementia.

She has always been a sharp, observant and involved person. Active in community functions, a former state legislator, an excellent teacher, good golfer and athlete, her list of accomplishments is long and varied.

She taught me mahjongg, a game that I love and now, she cannot play it. However, we, her friends, have insisted that she continue to play with us. We enjoy her company and playing with her allows us to demonstrate and practice patience and love.

I am not a Pollyanna about illnesses and aging. I am a realist, but I must admit that sometimes I do find it hard to reconcile a God who loves us unconditionally with the tragedy of serious illnesses. Especially dementia high jacking minds so fruitful and productive.

When I watch my friend struggle with recognizing the mahjongg tiles and remember that she carefully taught our group how to play only 10 years ago, I feel a deep compassion for her and others in this situation.  

My own dear mother suffered a form of dementia in the months before she died. It changed her sweet personality and made her life confused and frustrating. And I, I have a deep regret for the loss of patience that I had when dealing with her anger and confusion. Perhaps I can make some amends this summer when I play mahjongg with Carolyn as we laugh and giggle about the difference between bams and dots.

I will admit that I cannot make sense of these sicknesses. But I do practice my faith in a God that is more powerful than anything that I know. I trust that there will be a reconciliation of these trials in the time to come-maybe not in my time or in my way. I don’t do this perfectly; I practice and fail but start again with hope in my heart that the unconditional love of God for His children will ultimately wipe away all the tears. This is my prayer for you.

Terri